Chore List {or, earning money for our road trip!}

This trip, I’ve jotted down a list of chores I’d like to have help with and how much I’m willing to pay for them.  So far, it’s working like a charm!  The children have already completed half the list and our home is looking spic n span!  (Did your Mom use that expression when you were a kid?)

This is the Ohio Paid Chore List I printed for this trip.  I left room at the bottom to jot more down as I think of other dirty nooks.  I’ll pay out right before we leave so no one looses their money, puts it in someone else’s piggy bank, or otherwise misplaces it.  We’re one step closer to our big trip… the countdown is on!

Priorities

As I read before bed last night, after a sick mommy day where life’s priorities are suddenly seen with a clarity lacking in my healthy I-can-d0-everything days, this passage struck me regarding children:

 Jesus, too, loved hearing the children, and once it even triggered His anger.  The Creator, Sustainer, and Redeemer of the universe was fuming.  His disciples were only trying to help- protecting him, guarding him from the crowds… But when Jesus saw them rebuking… the children… “he was indignant.  He said to them, ‘Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.”  If this set Him off, it gives me pause to think He’s watching us now…

A new week is begun.  Monday is a day when we set priorities, make lists, start “back to school”.  We would do well to prioritize our lives not by what seems urgent but by the kingdom of God.

The grass can grow another 1/2 inch, the floor can be quickly swept instead of scrubbed & mopped, the world will not stop if you miss a facebook update…  Instead, read your little princess the story again.  Check out the amazing lego ship (that happens to look exactly like the last one he showed you) and admire the updated super-sonic engine with force field blasters your son brings down.  Talk to your teen.  (I’m totally preaching to myself here…)

Lord, help me to pour my life into the ones you’ve given me to love.  Amen.

Go Go Gadget… PATIENCE!!

Andrew just watched Inspector Gadget for the first time… and he loved it!  Do you remember Gadget?  He was the incredibly gadgeted, always bumbling, detective who saved the world from the evil schemes of Dr. Claw every Saturday morning.  With the help of Penny and Brain, of course.

Go go gadget chute! Go go gadget cuffs!  Go go gadget copter!  This robotic cop had all the tools he could possibly need for any evil scheme at his disposal.  But in spite of the awesome tricked-out suit, he messed up every single mission!

This morning, I found myself whispering, “Go Go Gadget, PATIENCE!!”  If I were Gadget, I think a flowerpot would have popped out of my hat or something comical like that.  Because in spite of my well-equipped suit, I too bumble…errr, sin… quite a bit.

I said it wistfully… but as I thought of it, the Gadget illustration really held out farther than my initial impulsive blurt.  (Which reminded me of Sarah on Labrynth, “I wish the Goblin King would come and take you away… right now.”  But I digress…)

Do you remember Brain, the brilliant dog?  He and Penny always had to bail Gadget out.  Well, it’s like that here, too.  I can wish for a go-go-gadget fix, but I really have to be engaged if I want to see change.  Kind of like Brain talking to Penny on their watch walkie-talkies.  (The Holy Spirit & me?  I know this is a stretch, but it’s my illustration & a comic after all!)

Here are some things Brain tells me, after my Go Go Gadget wish flops:
1) Think on scriptures that apply and meditate on them.  (ex: Let me be quick to listen, slow to speak & slow to become angry b/c my anger doesn’t achieve the righteous life God requires. -James 1:19 paraphrased by me)
2) Ask for help!  Go to the Lord.  Confess my sin, identify my weakness, and ask (beg!?) for His mercy, which is new each and every day.  AND ask a friend to pray for/with me and to check in on me later (it’s called accountability!)
3) Put off/put on.  I need to put into practice what I’ve just been meditating on!  I can’t read, “Love overlooks a multitude of sins” -1 Peter 4:8 and then keep on rehearsing all the ways my children/husband/the driver that just cut me off (fill in the blank) are making my life difficult!  (Side note: I’ve often noticed that they’re not even sinning against me, I’m just irritated b/c their preference isn’t the same as mine!  In those cases, I REALLY need to overlook!)
4) Go Go Gadget, SMILE!!  Raising my eyebrows helps change my whole countenance.

Summer Safety

Summer is in full swing and our children are having a blast!  Pool mornings, beach days, family visits, and extra time with friends make for happy kids and great summer memories.

With homework and early bedtimes in the past, it’s possible to focus so much on fun that children become careless.  Right now, in the middle of summer diversions, is the perfect time for a family refresher on summer safety

In all honesty, I would usually gloss over an article like this.  I mean, I’ve been parenting forever.  I have six kids who have never broken a bone.  Do I need a basic safety lesson?

Yes, yes I do.  A few weeks ago our family had an accident that reminded me of the importance of safety.

What was your most recent family disaster?  Sunburns or jellyfish stings?  A kitchen fire?  A lost child for three… five… 20 minutes?  Maybe a bike accident resulting in stitches or broken bones?  Whatever the trauma, being prepared can make the difference between panic and desperation and managing the chaos in a careful, orderly way.

One of the most important things for children to know is that it is always okay  to come straight to you.  We’ve taught our children to stop, take a deep breath, think and pray and come straight to Mom.  Having a clear head in an urgent matter is crucial!

Of course, most summer safety issues are relatively benign.  Remembering sunblock when surfing, staying hydrated in the Florida heat… these are easy when friends are looking out for each other.  Being aware of rip currents and always using the buddy system when in the water, knowing how to treat a sting, and who to trust (stranger safety) should be reviewed at age-appropriate times.

When Ben severed a tendon and fractured his toe at the beach, Ben’s friends wisely carried him straight to me.  I have never been so grateful for the well-stocked first-aid kit we keep in the van!!  We were able to clean the wound, glob on antibiotic ointment to keep the gauze pads from sticking and minimize infection, and then tape with enough pressure to reduce bleeding until we could get to the fire station and urgent care center then orthopedic surgeon.

No matter how prepared you or your children are, crazy accidents (like a shovel slipping from the hand and resulting in surgery!) can catch us by surprise.  2 Corinthians 12:9 offers comfort.  Jesus said, “My grace is sufficient for you, formy power is made perfect in weakness.”    Ask God for guidance while doing what you can and getting to help.  The wisdom of knowing who to turn to can help keep your family safe this summer!

This article was originally published in The Creekline.

10 Ways to Say Thanks

This article was originally published in The Creekline.

January is a month of numbers.  A countdown to the new year is where it begins.  Then we move to 3 or 5 resolutions.  Now, we’ll add a list of people your children should thank for wonderful holiday memories.  Yes, it’s Thank You note time!

I can hear you muttering something about winter doldrums being due to the outmoded practice of writing Thank You notes… but grumble no more!  You don’t have to stick with the stationary and fountain pen note (though those are my perineal favorites!)  There are as many ways to express gratitude as there were gifts under the tree.  It can be fun!  Browse through my 10 Ways to Say Thanks top ten and let me change your mind.

    TEN (We should count down, don’t you think?) Invite the giver over and enjoy the gift together!  Did your daughter receive a spa set?  Let her do nails with her friend.  Did Grandpa give his favorite Western to your boy?  Set up a time for them to enjoy popcorn and the cowboy movie together.  Whether your children jot a quick thank you note invitation or simply call to invite, using the gift together will create a better memory than any letter would.

NINE A picture is worth a thousand words.  Take a picture of your child enjoying the gift and let him write a quick thanks on the back.

EIGHT Draw a picture of the gift.  A horse-themed picture from your daughter to thank Nana for a My Little Pony set is sure to put a smile on any grandma’s face.

SEVEN Call!  Are you a procrastinator?  Super busy this time of year?  A call while you’re using the gift can be very meaningful.  We call Granny every time she sends a delicious treat and enjoy the moment together in spite of the miles that separate us.

SIX Write a poem.  Okay, okay- you can google one if you must.  But limericks are an easy, fun and funny way to mix it up.  These short (5 line) humorous poems with an AABBA rhyme scheme are perfect if the gift would be hard to gush over.  Fruitcake?  Tie?  No problem!

FIVE Let your little one watercolor a “picture” and you write a thanks for him over the dried masterpiece.

FOUR Pull out all the fun crafty goods (glitter, rick rack, googly eyes, stickers) and make the words THANK YOU pop off the front of a homemade card.

THREE Be specific in your thanks.  What was the gift?  How will you use it?  What was the first thing you thought when you saw it?  A thoughtfully written letter is never outdated.

TWO Give a sincere, personal thanks with a smile and a hug.  A live, in-person hug is hard to top!

ONE Keep it simple.  A post it note on the bathroom mirror, computer monitor, or any other unexpected place can brighten someone’s day.  Likewise, a flower picked from the garden with a little “thank you” attached can be simply perfect.

Grandparents, siblings, neighbors and friends put a lot of thought and love into the gifts, parties and treats your children received this Christmas.  When you teach the kiddos to say thanks, you’re giving the gift of gratitude which is in perfect taste all year round.

Scrooge was Right!

Return your Operation Christmas Child and Angel Tree gifts!  Cancel all cookie deliveries to fire stations.  No parties, no shopping, and please- do not serve a meal at the homeless shelter!!  Scrooge was right- Bah Humbug!!

The days between Thanksgiving and Christmas are among the busiest of the year.  Who has time to decorate, cook, entertain, shop, be a friend, be a daughter, bring snacks to school, be the gorgeous (and brilliant!) wife at the work party, and dress the children in perfectly coordinating outfits for the Christmas Eve service?  No thank you.  It’s just after Thanksgiving and I’m throwing in the towel.  Pass A Christmas Carol and a glass of eggnog.

Are you nodding in agreement or shaking your head in dismay?  I’d like to commend my favorite Christmas poem to both crowds*.  Yes, it’s a Christmas carol- but not Scrooge’s.  I’m taking my cue for Christmas 2010 from A Christmas Carol by Christina Rosetti. The last stanza reads:

What can I give Him,
Poor as I am?
If I were a shepherd
I would bring a lamb,
If I were a wise man
I would do my part,
Yet what I can I give Him,
Give my heart.

Even with a recessed economy, Americans are far from poor.  Oh, but how I can identify with this stanza!!!  I often say yes to so many “good” things that I have little left to offer the King of my heart.

So the truth of it all is if I have to choose between all of those holiday activities (which are wonderful, really) and quieting my soul long enough to appreciate the essence of Christmas, well I’d have to join Scrooge in shouting, “Bah Humbug!”

I’m not really wiping my calendar clean this December.  The ghost of Christmas present shows me a picture full of hope!  I have the opportunity to choose wisely, keep my priorities in line and celebrate the birth of the Savior!  Quieting my heart is a gift I can give to myself, my family and my God.  Praying, reading Luke’s account of Jesus’ birth (chapters 1 & 2) and remembering His purpose in coming- to redeem sinful people, to redeem me!- are part of the relationship that makes Christianity unique among all religions.  What a God!  What a gift!  Merry Christmas.

This article was originally published in The Creekline.

Party Shots

Last night was our “Welcome Clara” party! Georgia Anne enjoyed all 3 of her servings of the Eggplant Parmesan dinner Kim brought over. It was so very delish!! What a great way to start the party!

Thank You! {or, what to do with the kids on cold, winter days}

This article was originally published by Yours Truly (Allie Olsen) in The Creekline.

Does it sometimes surprise you which gifts your children love the most?  Like a baby who has more fun with the box than the
toy inside, children assign their own value to gifts.  Last year, a high dollar robot was tossed aside in favor of Legos and then everything was left behind when Daddy offered to play outside with a ball!

Regardless of the value (real or perceived), it is important to express gratitude to the giver.  Saying “thanks” while tearing
through the presents is not what I mean here!  At some point during the days and weeks that follow Christmas (and Birthday!) celebrations, have your children sit down and write out an old-fashioned thank you note.

Thank you notes can be as unique as the child sending them.   Ben’s most recent note was in gratitude for a tree stand someone
gave the guys for hunting.  I applauded his creativity when I realized he included a detailed story of how he scared away “the big one”.

Writing a story is one way to say THANKS in a personal way.  An artistically inclined student may pour their time into a
creative card or drawing.  Preschoolers can watercolor on heavy paper and then dictate a note for you to write over their “picture” to make it personal.

The goal isn’t to impress, the goal is to train up our children in being thankful so as they’re growing and maturing, gratitude
will come a little easier.  As your children are writing thier notes, encourage them that God can help them be creative as they do this good work!  “And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work.” -2 Corinthians 9:8

• Say thanks for their specific present.  Not, “Thanks for the gift.”  Reference how they plan to use it.  “I’m looking forward to wearing these turquoise socks with my new white sweater.”
• Challenge children to compose a note on their writing level.  A middle- or high-schooler’s note may include favorite Christmas memories, a funny story surrounding the gift, a sketch or something else to make the note more personal.
• Finally, allow the exercise of writing to be a blessing to your child just as it will be to the recipient of the note.  If your
  elementary student finds writing a note tedious, allow him to dictate his thoughts to you while you write out the letter.  This allows him to be creative without being encumbered by slow handwriting or spelling.  Or if your older child is enjoying learning to type, this could be a great opportunity to increase computer skills!  Whether it’s a computer generated card or a Word Document note, make sure they sign their name by hand.

Using Proverbs to Teach Your Children

This article was originally published in Homeschooling Today, an encouraging resource for Christian homeschoolers.   

      I have a confession to make.  I hate coloring books!  As a child, I never wanted to slow down long enough to “stay in the lines.”  My kindergarten teacher gave up and let me grade papers for her during coloring time instead!  At home school conventions, I don’t buy workbooks that even look like them!  But a year ago, I was introduced to a little coloring book that changed my life.

    Our second child, Lauren, was six and had just mastered reading.  We wanted to integrate a devotional into her reading time twice a week and I set out to find the perfect book.  After wandering the aisles of our local convention the second day, a friendly smile from the Doorposts booth prompted me to ask for advice.  Did they have a beginning reader that would teach a girl godly character?  She handed me- you guessed it- a coloring book. 

    The simple booklet, “A Young Lady of Valor” Proverbs 31 for Girls filled the bill.  Each page had one or two sentences from Proverbs 31 with an accompanying picture to color.  There were no zany illustrations, the scripture was the King James Version (which would be hard for her to read with the extra -th sounds) and it was a coloring book!  But it was perfect for a beginning reader’s first devotional.  It was perfect because it was simply the word of God. 

    Lauren was thrilled to do a girls-only Bible study.  I remained unconvinced and wondered how long a 19 page booklet could possibly last.  We read the first verse, “Who can find a virtuous woman?  For her price is far above rubies.”  The book I initially thought of as too short and too simple immediately began to minister to Mom and daughter in such a profound way it set a precedent for our schooling that continues today.  I shared what a gift Lauren is to her Daddy and to me.  We discussed her incredible value to our family practically, relationally, and also her inestimable worth before our heavenly Father.  Her brothers, doing other schoolwork in the adjacent dining room, chimed in with why she’s special to them.  As she skipped off to color in the first page, I sat on the couch dumbfounded… and not only because the boys had been kind to their sister!  I was seeing the fruit of teaching from Proverbs. 

    I never had to remind Lauren to take the Bible, her “study book” and the colored pencils out on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  page by page, we discussed how the Lord would have a six year old girl live for him.  When she read, “She will do him good and not evil” she scribbled some blue, green and orange on the picture then cleaned up some of her brothers’ things and told her Daddy she was learning to be kind to him so she could learn to be a good wife one day. 

    A few weeks later, she asked what it meant to “giveth meat to her household.”  While I explained it meant to feed her family well, she colored a bit more carefully and then asked if she could make her brothers a snack.  The day we read, “She maketh herself coverings of tapestry” I had an opportunity to praise the skill of sewing.  Although I can’t follow a pattern to save my life, we chatted about friends and family who enjoy sewing and excel at it.  My desire as a mom is for each of my children to surpass me in both knowledge and skill, so the next time she was with Granny they did a sewing project together.  Lauren came home telling me how easy it is and that I really should finish the apron I started 2 years ago!

    As mammas, we have the privilege to gently impress biblical truth upon our daughters’ hearts until they are molded into the image of God.  We can train them and strengthen our own understanding by discipling our daughters in the very areas that challenge us.  You may talk about finding joy in serving others, creative ways to make meals tasty and fun, or working with willing hands.  We’re not confident as parents or teachers because we know what to do but because we rely on the greatest teacher.   He instructs our minds and guides our hearts through the word. 

    We’re reading a new book every Tuesday and Thursday now.  The 19kth century language paints pictures in Lauren’s mind of a girl growing into a woman.  We both enjoy it and her reading is improving daily.  But it’s the little Proverbs 31 coloring book that changed our lives.  She colored her way through the book and I learned to color her life with the Word. 

Allie Olsen continues to read books on godly character with her 5 children in St. Augustine, Florida.  www.gracefullmom.com

The Heart of Sharing

This article was originally printed in The Creekline.

Also, “The Heart of Sharing” is the second in a 2-part article on sharing.  Read part 1 first by clicking here!

Sharing is an outward evidence of the heart’s disposition.  Either a person will be selfless, preferring others and sharing, or they will be selfish.  Since it is a matter of the heart, it is not something you can force or coerce.  It is, however, a value you can develop and encourage your child in.

Making them share is not accomplishing the Biblical precept.  2 Corinthians 9:7 says, “You must each make up your own mind as to how much you should give. Don’t give reluctantly or in response to pressure. For God loves the person who gives cheerfully.”  So much for the “Robin Hood” tactics of taking toys from the child with more to placate the whinier!  This verse clearly states that giving should not be forced.

How, then, do we teach our children to share?  Train them to find joy in giving and encourage them to do more than the bare minimum.  Last month I spoke of leading toddlers to share even before they comprehend why they should do so.  Yes, I will train little Andrew to share his horse- but ultimately I desire him to find joy in blessing others.  The Bible speaks of this kind of love as outdoing one another in showing honor.  (Romans 12:10)  We encourage this kind of serving while picking up at home.  Instead of asking, “who left those toys on the floor?” I may ask “Who can bless your brother by picking up his truck?”  In keeping our family’s attention on serving one another, we cultivate an others-focused mindset.

The most influential way you teach is both the easiest and hardest… by your example every day.  Do you live in such a way that you constantly model giving to your family?  Do your children see you slow down and let other drivers pull in front of you?  When is the last time you demonstrated sacrificial giving to friends or strangers in need?  When heading into a restaurant, do you rush to beat another group in?  To drill it down to even simpler daily occurences, think of your time at home as a family.  The next time you hear a little voice calling “Moooommmyyy”, give your attention and respond with a smile instead of fussing, “wait a minute!” or “Not right now!”  These are simple ways to daily model sharing.  Opportunities to show that you live out what you teach abound!

Training your children in heart issues like preferring others requires diligence.  After modelling right attitudes and responses to your children and training them patiently for days on end, you may find yourself growing weary.  You may even be tempted to console yourself with, “Gimme a break!  Surely they’ll grow out of this whining and choose to share!”

As Mom to five and with personal insight into my own heart (and many friends who dare to be honest about their selfish thoughts) I can assure you that people don’t “just grow out of it.”  Sure, your little ones may realize it is socially unacceptable to throw a tantrum but many adults continue to live a self-centered life!

Parenting is hard work.  But watching your child grow into a genuinely godly, selfless parent to your grandchildren is worth the investment!  This kind of “passing the torch” is what it’s all about.  Teaching our children that good things come to those who share (Matthew 23:11-12) and that it is more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35) is training them for right living in childhood and beyond.